I am in fact British. I was born and raised to be the greatest Gentleman I could be. I think my folks and my country did quite a good job of it!
During a conversation with the famous @joshlaurito (http://joshlaurito.kinja.com/ - read his stuff!) and @chrisneveu (http://chrisneveu.kinja.com/) during lunch today, they tipped me off on how funny things would be if PHP were written to be British.
I shall now quote thee on some choice words from the website AddedBytes whom have written a fantastic blog entry titled "If PHP were British"
How many of today's British programmers have been put off at the outset by the brazen informality of this simple yet obscenely Americanised program, colloquially referred to as "Hello World"? A more Imperial, formal introduction might encourage a greater proportion of young British talent to remain with the language and thus give the broader community a more urbane air.
I strongly suggest taking a read.. it is quite enlightening how much better things would be if they were British!
Here's some examples..
If Bill Clinton was British
How could Bill Clinton not be British with Liz Hurley next to him??
If America was British
You are stricken with disbelief at the foul act that was just committed in front of your very eyes. In a sudden instant you turn to the uncouth bugger and give him a real good talking to. How dare he!
If Dunkin' Donuts was British
Well, then again, I don't believe there'd be any difference than the States in this case. Except, you know, the uniform and a bunch of people talking more eloquently.